While I do know that the dishwashing chore is something that has been done to death in my blog, still, if I don’t launch off on a rant about it here, where else will I do it??!

Sometime during the fag end of October, during yet another frustrating dishwashing spree, I decided that I will try my best to wash the vessels after every meal time. It was at that time that I was having one of those inspiring moments reading Elle Luna’s ‘The Crossroads of Should and Must’. While she applies it to larger visions of life, I thought I will include this mundane task too in my list of things I MUST do as often as possible. After all, without any extra helping hand, I was already doing it every single day leaving a clear sink every night. So why not do it without procrastinating and letting the dishes pile up??

Now, guess what happened after that? I felt as though I was standing in front of the sink more often and yet, at 8/ 8:30 pm as I did the last round for the day, there still seemed to be yet another huge array of vessels!

Now the mind has this cruel way of playing around with your thoughts. Dishwashing is usually that solitary time when it is just me and my thoughts. And, as you obviously know, it is one chore that I just hate. As I let my thoughts go on an overdrive, the first thing it screams out loud, especially on an exhausting day, is ask me why the hell I gave up my career and chose to take on this task instead?!
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You know those crazy days, don’t you? That kind of a day when your child starts to unleash his naughty acts. When he refuses to eat what is usually his preferred food. When you’re sure that you are going to have a crying spree from your daughter because she has way too many things to be excited about and that is indeed what she ends up doing.

Then there is the sink overflowing with dishes to be washed. The laundry waiting to be done. The new school books waiting to be covered and labelled. Dinner waiting to be cooked.

Causing it all was the rainy pleasant weather which gave such a lazy beginning to the day that the already sleep-deprived you just couldn’t pull yourself out of the bed! And when this resulted in you almost dozing off during Shavasana when doing yoga, you can bet this is how the day will turn out to be!

Yes, it is the weather that I am going to blame which resulted in the outdoor play time of R getting reduced which resulted in his poor appetite.

Keeping R engaged indoor needed much more time and energy resulting in all other mundane chores being put on hold.

The weather delayed the clothes getting dried up which postponed the laundry chore getting done.

All these resulted in me becoming as cranky and irritated as my own children. Should I tell you anything more about the state in which I am in right now?

Rainy days are fun only when the only thing you have to do is to sit back and indulge on a hot samosa or a pakoda. 😛 It is no fun when you have a never-ending, ever-pending long list of chores and tasks to be done. Sigh!

This blog has been left to rust yet again by me. There definitely has not been a dearth of thoughts or happenings to be written about, but, barring a few sentences here and there, I have just not been able to sit and write lengthy posts. The words just refused to pour though and I just refused to prioritize my creative pursuits of any sort having been totally wrapped up in the parenting responsibilities and housekeeping chores.
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On a visit to the Central Library at Bugis after several months, I stepped inside the all-too-familiar children’s section which houses this beautiful mock treehouse having recycled plastic bottles on ceiling doubling up as branches and leaves. The children’s section had underwent renovation and the treehouse with baby-friendly chairs and rocking stools all around it were inaugurated only in mid 2013. The collection of books was as attractive to me as it was to my daughter.

The year 2014 was when we spent at least an hour there every week as we let our then 2-year old daughter play all around the tree house, choose her own books and read those with her. I absolutely loved all those colourful baby books which were made all the more fun by having all those interesting features like flaps. Spot the pup, Usborne publishers’ book featuring that little, yellow duck hidden in all the pages, ABCD or counting books, numerous books on farms, Olivia the pig, Elmo teaching ABCD, animals, etc. and so on. Spot the pup series was the one S enjoyed so much that she called herself Spot and called her father and I by the name of Spot’s parents, Sam and Sally.

Yesterday, as I automatically turned towards our favourite board books section, the age group printed for that category brought with it with the cliched thought of how time flies! 0-3 years, said the board. Now, both my children have crossed that age group!

My thoughts didn’t stop with all the stages and baby milestones that my children have crossed or the reading milestones that S has crossed as she can now read all the children’s books and magazines on her own and even reads all his books for R too or the way R can mimic the phonic sounds of letters of small words now. In a year or so, he will also start reading simple books.

This library means more to us than just reminding us of our love for books and reading. This was a part of our weekly routine which only got completed with a visit to Krishnar temple, walking through Waterloo Street, which, to me, showcases perfectly all things typically Singapore, and shopping at Fairprice at the now demolished Rochor Centre.

As I went through a wave of feel-good memories, I found myself having a relaxing moment. And what better place to relax than a library which has this huge collection of books and comfortable seating to sit back and read and a small treehouse for babies and children to take their books to and ‘read’!

Coming back to the children’s section of the library itself, the rocking stools and chairs have been replaced with fewer chairs, the baby book collection not as much as it used to be. I couldn’t find even one Spot the puppy book. Have all been borrowed because of the double loan quota now?

But we still had a relaxing time as little R was busy exploring what was a not-so-familiar place to him. As for S, she was so happy to be back in the treehouse after a long time. Except that this time it was not a go-up-and-down-the-treehouse that she wanted to do or browse through Spot the pup or some board book, but it was some storybook that she grabbed and sat down to read as R walked all around the place playing with computer mouse or taking a random book or impatiently waiting to collect his Book Bug collectible cards from the machine. Time, indeed, flies!

Written a couple of weeks back….

Even as I am taking that train journey from Chennai Egmore to Mayiladuthurai Junction which always feels so comforting, my thoughts go on a whirlwind tour.

Sun shines brightly on the lush, green paddy fields and the winding canals. I see a white kokku/crane swoop down to a canal and see it reflected on the water. A sight as beautiful as this is a daily occurrence in this part of the world! Not content to call it just a crane/ kokku, I feel the urge to Google it to see if I can find the exact species of egret or stork or whatever it is. But I let it pass since it suddenly strikes me how simple life in itself was back then, during those carefree, childhood days which was filled with oodles of happy moments. It didn’t matter if it was a crane or an egret or whatever else it may be. All that mattered was going to the vayal / field with my maternal uncles and spotting those kokkus.

Looking outside from the comfort of the cooler confines of the air-conditioned compartment, I let that strong wave of nostalgia wash over me. Moments like those are just nostalgia and nothing more today. Time, they say, is the greatest healer. But all it actually does is help us get used to the idea of someone or something not being there….

The last month of last year seemed to pass by very quickly, as every December has been ever since I became a Carnatic music and December music season aficionado.

December is that month when I am always in my beloved Madras, celebrating the music season gaining an enriching musical experience at as many Sanjay’s kutcheris as possible while my children enjoy their school vacation not caring much about what I am doing or where I am going. Being in Madras only has me rooting even more for life that would have been. Alas such is life and all that…. This December also saw me visiting my dream destination, Hampi. The grandeur of the ruins did indeed leave me in awe.
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Fourth Saturday after today, I’ll land in Madras. Yes, it’s school vacation time and I can’t tell you how excitedly we are already doing the countdown!

Before that, Deepavali is the one thing that has all of us excited about. From the ‘fireworks’ (Do sparklers and other fire-less party poppers count as fireworks?) sessions with different sets of friends to the yummy sweets and snacks preparation to the family having holidays during Deepavali, it is going to be lots of fun. And lots of work too.

The house is at its clutter-max what with the kitchen sink overflowing with vessels to be washed, the ever-present colourful mess of toy cars and all sorts of vehicles strewn all around the house and the washing machine waiting with the full load of clothes to be washed!

I woke up in the morning thinking that I’ll not start Deepavali sweets/snacks preparation today, yet I suddenly felt that I shouldn’t let myself end up with too much to be done in the end. So I made lunch and dinner in the morning itself and started off the preparation for making Badam Katli.

That’s when R refused to go with his dad and S for the swimming class. While he cried and asked me to come with him, I knew S was rejoicing that he was doing a good job of it and I’ll definitely go with them. I am sure the husband too would have been happy to have some me-time at home.

Thus, the family succeeded and now, here I am, sitting by the swimming pool thinking of all that I could have completed at home had I had these two hours to myself. Then, it strikes me that I do have this one hour just for myself. But can I truly relax when I know that I have a long day ahead of me?

Did I tell you how I always find these swimming and water play sessions for the kids very tiring? I hate the wet and smelly changing rooms and toilets at these places and the wet and slippery floor around the pool too. From the moment we leave the pool it’s a lot of work till the children are given a nice, long bath and fed well. Not to forget the work later on when S’ long hair has to be dried and plaited.

Even as I write about all these routine chores which every Sita, Gita and Rita (how about a change from Tom, Dick and Harry since they, anyway, won’t be doing most of these chores?) do, I also realize how a major chunk or almost the entire day goes off in doing all these. Now, can someone tell me how does a SAHM find some quality me-time for herself?

Murphy always strikes everytime I take a resolution of any sort. Here I was hoping to revive the mindfulness routine when Murphy’s law struck in full force within a few hours. S had a full-blown tantrum that evening right after coming back from school. At the end of a crying spell of any sort, which while happening will always look like it will never end, the child looks calm and, in fact, looks refreshed. But what about the parent?

From breaking one’s head at that time to think of anything to stop the tantrum and calm the child or finding it tough to maintain inner calm while the crying and yelling continue to blow out of control or pondering it all over once again trying to figure out on when and where I went wrong, it is exhaustion of sorts that I always feel. Imagine hitting a hat trick with this happening for three days in succession with the third day featuring an epic meltdown of sorts right in the play area in front of all friends, acquaintances and people whom you meet every single day! Embarrassment, helplessness, anger directed towards self at how, even after so many years, I am still not able to handle it ALL – you name it and I was feeling it all! Later that evening, S was completely calm and relaxed. She had finally let out all the tiredness of the last couple of weeks arising from all the excitement.

Just when I thought that I was done with all the crying from S, along came the icing on the cake from R. Now, he is one boy who is crazy about cars, or rather, all sorts of vehicles, robots and superheroes. And he always is choosy, going in only for specific toys which he will continue to cherish long after buying it. I was looking forward to being in the relaxing company of a good friend after all the exhaustion of the previous few days and took little R with the friend and her child to a fair/carnival. Fairs in Singapore are all about fun and interesting activities for kids and freebies. FREEBIES – that is where it all started. He really wanted a superhero soft toy at a stall, but he didn’t get it.

By now, considering the number of fairs that I have taken him to, one must have expected him to get used to luck, disappointment, winning, losing and all that. But, when the toy in question is a superhero, is it even fair to expect understanding from a 3-year old?! He really was in a big disappointment that he couldn’t get that toy! R had what is akin to an epic meltdown of sorts for his level, crying for an hour just for that superhero toy! While he is no match for his sister when it comes to tantrums, of late, his crying skill seems to be improving.

The last one week in itself has been similar to hitting a jackpot of sorts when it came to the children’s moods. Yesterday, by the time it was evening, I felt completely drained. In a miracle of sorts, both the children slept earlier than usual. That was how tired they were.

As for me, I ended up with a splitting headache and just couldn’t sleep. At 4 am, with a cup of hot coffee in hand, I sat down in front of the computer, reading random news. Then I decided to write this here to track my progress on maintaining patience. PATIENCE – just what is that??!