You know those moments in life, don’t you, when, for what seems like a trivial thing when seen in the entire context of life & universe in itself, you keep panicking and when all you want to do to is to genuinely put in some effort to relax and yet you are just not able to? Well, just like how the previous sentence turned out to be an avalanche of words, the mind is also spinning off on an avalanche of what-ifs.
During moments like these, I generally follow the popular advice on focussing on the current task at hand and have realized many times that there is much more to be done NOW than letting your mind go out of control. Yet there are times when it’s all easier said than done.
It’s during moments like these that I remember my blog.
Though when I see retrospectively, it was only for a very few years that I wrote regularly here, the satisfaction it gave me at that time in sharing all that I enjoyed and other observations on life in itself is still afresh in my mind. It’s another fact that it was during those years that I experienced how fragile life itself is. But the blog helped distract the mind.
In fact, that’s one reason I continue to maintain this site till today. There are also some instances when my own blog page continues to show up in Google search when I search for some Carnatic composition. Reliving those moments of late, I just thought that I should simply login and write something here.
As years pass, I see many around me letting go of a lot of things. Take my favourite celebrities for instance. Sanjay Subrahmanyan, who strictly sang only Carnatic music, has suddenly started singing fusion and even film songs! A R Rahman, who didn’t speak beyond a few words in interviews, is nowadays talking a lot and that too in a completely relaxed state! Did we even think that there will come a day when he will even try to dance?! Not to forget the fact that he seems to be composing music for way too many films of late, that one is not even able to keep a track of it!
I wonder if there will come a day when I will also be able to let go of some of my inhibitions. I do know that it’s all easier said than done, since these words from ‘You’ve Got Mail’ keeps resonating with me :
Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life – well, valuable, but small – and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven’t been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn’t it be the other way around?
There have been many jottings of introspections & retrospections like this one that I wanted to write here over the last few years, but I never really posted anything. I would say that publishing this post now is itself a minor act of letting go. 🙂
Even as I end this post by wishing you all very happy new year 🙂 , wish me luck for this year as I seek to practice letting go.